Holy fuck.

So this morning I bought a 360 S, in order to finally utilize the hard drive I took from my old 360 S – over 3 years ago. That was harrowing on its own for a moment because it’s been so long since I’ve seen one, that I freaked out for a minute and thought I might have wasted $60 on something that doesn’t even have a SATA bay.  Then I used the Google and solved that problem. After which it took 5 minutes to figure out how to delete the previous owner’s profile from this machine. It’s way more complicated than it should be.

Why did I buy a 360? Well I have a hard drive with a lot of unfinished game saves on it. And a lot of 360 games still aren’t backwards compatible. I’m looking at you, all Ninja Gaidens, and Dante’s Inferno, for example.

So I figured hey I’ll stop by the GameStop – no one goes there so I can just pop in and meander about the store in privacy, attempting to commune with this holy place.

I live in Houston. Houston is built on a swamp. You can build a city on a swamp, but the city is still on a swamp – meaning you can’t change the weather too. So as it did yesterday and Wednesday, it rained balls. However, that wasn’t the immediate issue. I don’t mind rain, and frankly, I’d have been happier to stand in the torrential downpour than to spend one single minute in that suppurating asshole of acrimony and self-loathing they call a video game store.

If the very fact that you find yourself inside a GameStop with the unwashed masses isn’t inherently enough to send you over the edge, don’t fret – this company will ensure that you want to die before you leave. The stores get smaller every year, and the floor space is so fucking crowded and aggressively commercial that it’s demeaning.

This is what GameStop used to look like and still does in many locations.

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This is what smaller stores and most of those that haven’t been closed look like now.

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Holy fuck dude, can I get some fucking room to breathe? I wish I took pictures but you know, I didn’t, because I don’t go to a retail store with the intention to complain and be a jerk and waste space. GameStop bought ThinkGeek and I thought the entire point of opening separate retail ThinkGeek stores was to move all this shit where it belongs. I like these products. I own some Funko Pops. I do not go to GameStop to buy them, nor do most people. This particular store on I-45 is one of the smaller locations, and over half of the sales floor is covered in stand-alone displays that aren’t even video games. Funkopop, Five Nights at Freddy’s Sister Location plushes, stuffed animals, Fallout 4 crew socks, in other words – bullshit.

Not only is half the sales floor covered in shit that isn’t a video game, but there are literally 3 shelves of video games. Three shelves, on which there are video games. The options are Xbox One new / preowned, Xbox 360 pre-owned, PS4 new/pre-owned, PS3 pre-owned, and Switch / WiiU. Again – I’m not equating one location to all of GameStops stores, but this isn’t a rarity. This store is not unique in its shittiness.

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This must be from 2006 or so judging by the Battlefield 2 on there, holy PC games

If the store wasn’t already bad enough, don’t worry – that can be fixed. There are kids running around and constantly moving, touching shit, picking it up, knocking it over. This is Houston so, I’m the only white person  besides the cashier and manager. Just little kids bleating constant Spanish with no tact or presence of mind whatsoever. Make no mistake – it doesn’t matter what language it could have been. If you are loud and boisterous and talking non-stop in public, I hate you. No matter what. I’ve hated people who talk loud in public and people who talk too much in public, since I was a kid. I’m not going to change now. Turn it down from 13 to 5, please.

Just as a funny aside – one of the people in front of me tried to trade in GTA4 for PS3. They offered him 2 cents. Two. Cents. GTA4 is still generally $10 to $15 used.

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Flash flooding from just a couple hours ago, during the rain.

So back to the rain. It’s raining balls outside, constant lightning, raining Hawaii hard. If you’ve ever been to Kauai, you know what I mean. Sheets of rain. Like it isn’t just raining, there’s a rain god up there with the most absurd high pressure super-soaker Gatling gun imaginable trying for the high score. Lo and behold, the power goes out after I’ve spent 35+ minutes in the store including waiting in a line that wraps all the way around it. Why? Because a dude brought in 20 games to trade them in and it literally took the second cashier  the entire time to give him an estimate. GameStop manager says

“Alright everyone needs to get out.”

Fucking excuse me? We need to get out, into the rain and lightning? What the fuck kind of corporate policy is this? I’ve worked retail as a manger before. We sure as hell never kicked people out when the weather was bad enough to knock the power out.

The black dude in front of me is says

“Alright everybody grab what you can.”

I agree. I just spent 30 minutes in your store waiting while you fucking bullshat with every customer for 8 minutes asking them your corporate sales pitches and you tell us all to get out? No, sir.

So I eventually got to the counter, without the power going out a second time thankfully, and dude tries to get me to renew my Pro membership which is at least 4 years expired. I shut him down immediately. Fuck that.  I came here to buy these two games specifically, and it would have been more if they had NG3 Razor’s Edge or an actual case for NG2, and I don’t give a damn if Pro Rewards can save me an entire $2. All I want is my games and I’m out of this popsicle stand (get it, because that’s literally how big it is.)

Then they take my retail case I got from the shelf for Sunset Overdrive,and replace it with one of those generic trash GameStop cases. That makes me angry. I still believe in physical media to an extent and I don’t want ugly ass cases on my shelf at home, give me the real case back or don’t sell me the game.

Give me my games and I’m never coming back here again. I’ll wait for shipping from an online store next time.

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